#16: Realities

3rd day into the new year and 72hrs learnt loads about Life. Seems like Year 2012 is a going to be a journey full of learning.

Lost really good friends whom I have known for years. It seems that the issue is in me not caring about them enough. That they have put in so much effort for me but i did not return the effort. Maybe it is the difference in how we think. For one, I never had the expectation for people to do things for me. I grew up learning hard independence - Through tears and heartbreaks. I loved people, but many broke my heart and hurt me - those whom i have no means to do harm to, and people whom i don't even really know. Yups, prolly learning to treasure would be something, but not being myself is another. Maybe through the years, I have lost abit of "feelings" and became somewhat insensitive. Maybes. Or maybe it's just the difference in perspectives.

Learnt that, new friends can be made, but what turns out is another thing.
And... Game theories definitely sounds interesting, but when applied, it makes everything abit planned and superficial.

Learnt that, following the heart doesn't always works, the brain needs to be part of it too.

Learnt that, maybe, I'm not suited to be a particular "Leadership" position. Or rather, i feel that im not yet suited. I can't please everyone.

Learnt that, if you do not participate in the games people are playing, you'll always be on the losing end - For not playing.

Learnt that, if everyone is NOT playing these games, the world will be a much better place.

Learnt that, time is very precious. Maybe im not doing certain stuffs or at certain places because, that is not where im meant to be.

Learnt that, Life is making me learnt the hard way. And that's the way to learn more about Life.

2012 - I shall aim to be a better me.